Englishman, Frenchman, New Yorker

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a New Yorker were on a sea voyage when a powerful storm came up and wrecked their boat. However, they weren't far from an island and were washed ashore unharmed. Unfortunately for the sailors, however, this island was inhabited by a savage tribe who found the men lying unconscious and dragged them into the center of the village. When the sailors came to, they found themselves bound, gagged, and tied to stakes around a large heap of firewood. Terrified, the Englishman managed to spit out his gag and called out, "What are you going to do to us?!" All together, the savages chanted, "We're going to cook you, and eat you, and use your skin for our canoes!" At this, the Frenchman fainted dead away. One of the savages came up, jostled the Frenchman awake, and removed the men's gags. "S'il vous plait!" The Frenchman begged - "Ne nous tuez pas! (Please! Don't kill us!)" But the savages were not to be persuaded. Again they chanted: "We're going to cook you, and eat you, and use your skin for our canoes!" Another savage held a lit torch a few inches away from the wood, and called out, "Any last words?" Proudly, the Englishman yelled, "Long live England!" Straightening up, the Frenchman likewise yelled, "Vive la France!" To everyone's surprise, the New Yorker whipped out a knife, began STABBING himself all over, and vindictively shouted, "F*CK YOUR CANOES!"